Big Girl School is Around the Corner

This Summer has been a lot of things. Busy, fun, long, short, quiet, crazy and very special. I have had the sense, all summer long, that this was basically the last Summer of Diva Child's babyhood. She hasn't seemed like a 'baby' for a while now, but still she is my first baby.



In a week, Diva child will put on a special dress and new shoes and the two of us will trot off to her first day of nursery school. While I am delighted that she is going and I know she is ready I would be lying if I said this new thing isn't causing some trepidation in my heart.



As I have examined my conflicted feelings on this I have realized that we have been living in a very small, safe, innocent, and happy world together. Our family life is very happy. I take deep joy and delight in my family. I love mothering my kids, even when they are driving me up a wall. Our 'social life' is simple. We have a few close friends that we hang out with, but otherwise, we spend the bulk of our days together. So, in other (less flattering) words, I maintain a lot of control over my family right now. Not in controlling them, but in controlling their access to the big world 'out there'.



My kids just aren't exposed to a lot of the world. There are a lot of wonderful things out there in the big world. There are new friends, other caring adults who can encourage Diva Child's gifts, new experiences, new foods, classroom pets, arts and crafts and many many more things for a pre-schooler to encounter at school. But there are things that scare me...social structures that little children try on for size...rejection, injustice, materialism, high fructose corn syrup, bad words, adults that are hard and mean.



Now, before you all get the idea that my kids have never eaten high fructose corn syrup or that I have would never lose it or be overly harsh in a bad mommy moment....those are mine to own. They are my mistakes to make. I haven't yet handed either of my children over in this way to experience the world without me.

It is with excitement, nerves, and peace that I prepare my Diva Child for preschool. Oh the stories those teachers will have to tell....

Thank you to Karen and Julie who inspired me to post about this.

Transformation

My office is complete. I am so very happy with how it turned out!! Big Daddy and I have been burning it the last few weeks to transform the space from 'cluttered dumping ground' to beautiful office. I am so pleased!
Before: Okay, to be honest it is not the *real* before. It is much nicer that the gritty 'crap all over the place' look we had going before this slightly better picture.

After: I am really really pleased. I will say that I realize I have to take the tags off the fake plants. I am going to paint inside the window wells as well.














This is the first full on reclaiming a space project that I have ever done. I am just delighted with the outcome.

Now, if anyone is wondering where I am, you all know where to find me!

Small Luxuries

Everywhere out side of New England, road weary travelers pull up to the Starbucks drive-thru in a harried and distracted way; one of many stops along their way as they move through the day.



When I saw the Drive-Thru sign I practically squealed the breaks as I abruptly changed direction to recaffinate.



Now, I do realize that this is shallow. I realize that it makes me look like a lazy person to be that excited about getting my hot cup of goodness without ever leaving my car. As it all turns out it is a royal pain in the ass to drag two little children into the local coffee shop or Starbucks. While I am trying to order I have to keep their hands out of displays, ward off the demands for cookies and treats, then feel guilty that I am getting something but am saying no to the GIANT cookie for the kids, balance my scalding hot coffee while holding two squiggley hands of kids that want to hurl themselves in front of the slow moving mini vans of the other distracted mommies trying to get through stopping off for coffee. So, because of this scene I often drive right on past Starbucks thinking about how nice a Grande Americano with Soy would be and then move along to the next thing on my mental list.



My heart may have skipped a beat when I saw the drive-thru. At age 30, a mother of two children, the feeling that was once reserved for spotting the hot guy across the student court yard is now relegated to a Starbucks drive-thru. I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry....I pick being really happy to have a steaming Grande Americano with Soy in the comfort of my mommy car without ever leaving it.

It's the simple things that can make my day.

The Fresh Salt Air

The sunshine and salt air just transforms me and my family. Each year we make our way to Cape Cod for a family vacation. Big Daddy and I started going there 6 years ago and have been back every year except one. My parents have fallen in love with this tradition and have kept our family vacation alive by renting a big beach house so that we can join them. (THANK YOU mom and dad!!).

When I was in my early 20's I scoffed at the lack of creativity shown by boring old people who would habitually return to the same damn place every year. Now I delight in the simplicity of the 'same damn place' every year. All I really want is the beach and salt air. When the best kid beach ever has been found, why shake that treasure up? Because so much of the time, life with kids is unpredictable, it is nice to at least be familiar with the destination.

Both of my kids are May babies. When we return each August we can really take a step back and look at how much they have grown.

Last year, Man Puppy was weeks old and the two of us suffered in 100+ degree heat and humidity. We spent a lot of time in a cold bath with a fan pointed at us. He was also recovering from a bout of thrush and had a bright purple face from being treated with gentian violet.

This year he was thumping his big Man Puppy feet up and down the wooden floors of the beach house. He was diving into the salt water with the unbridled joy of a toddler without fear. He would cry as we carried his shivering self up to our spot in the sun to warm him back up as his purple bottom lip trembled in sorrow at being pulled from the cold waves.

Diva Child is now more cautious at the ripe old age of 3. She is less fearless of the rolling waves and wily seaweed. She was preoccupied with the existence of jellyfish (I didn't see one while we were there). She enjoyed clinging to me or Big Daddy in the water so long as we promised not to let go and put her down in the water for her feet to touch the pebbly sand.

There were great times visiting with our Natty Uncle from the Mountains. Diva Child was smitten with his head full of dread locks and charming smile.

Man Puppy was 15 months going on 17 as he sat side by side with 'Antz' as he has taken to calling Natty Uncle from the Mountains. He took big giant baby gulps of Uncle's Vitamin Water...he was throwing high fives in a way that was less baby and more teenage boy than I could take!

At the end of the week I am always exhausted by the whole wonderful experience. There is sand that will stay in my car until next year when we return. I have a pile of salty sandy towels waiting for me to shake out and wash. Despite all the work the beach creates, I always return home deeply refreshed.

I keep Crying Baby, Baby Please!

So it seems that after all these years, all of this time, my secret boyfriend finally responded to my silent plea and decided to come into town to put on a rock show just for me.

Okay, well that's how it played out in my mind anyway when I heard that The Police decided to go on tour this summer.

In all actuality, my very wonderful Big Daddy husband got me tickets months ago. At the time we were in the middle of a bad patch of night time parenting and the tickets were a great distraction of good things to come. The anticipation of a night out with my Bid Daddy man to see my favorite band of all time has been as good as the AMAZING experience of seeing The Police play live.

Most of the artists I adore are not great big rock stars. While their concerts have been amazing interactive experiences, there is something different about seeing a widely revered & acclaimed rock band with tens of thousands of other people.

Seeing The Police was a bit like a reunion with old friends, but maybe better. It was a nostalgic experience hearing their legendary songs as only they can play them. At the same time there was a fresh take on their music that showcased their evolution as artists ....it reminded me why they were great to begin with; they have always played their music well. Their presentation of their classic songs was done in a familiar way. To me, it felt like the perfect balance of familiarity with innovation. Sting's voice is as clear and lovely as it has ever been. All of his hallmark yodel like "eyooooo eyo yo yo's" were spot on and in full beautiful force.

My favorite songs of the evening were: Walking on the Moon, So Lonely, I Can't Stand Losing You, Wrapped Around Your Finger, Next to You, Invisible Sun ,Every little Thing She Does is Magic, Walking in Your Footsteps and King of Pain.

There were only two downsides to the evening. First, I really wanted to hear them play Canary in a Coalmine and that didn't happen. But there was enough of my more obscure (if any of their songs can really be called 'obscure') favorites to make up for that omission.
My second complaint has nothing to do with Sting or The Police, but the venue. The parking and crowd control was, at best, abysmally bad. It took us well over an hour to get out of the 'parking area' which amounted to a big field of cars trying to drive every which way without rhyme or reason. Once out of the field, it was at least another 35 minutes to slowly meander to the 'exit' of Rentschler Field.

I feel so fortunate that I was able to go to this show. It did feel like a very special event to go to because it doesn't seem that they will pull a Rolling Stones and Tour, Tour, Tour every summer for the foreseeable future.

Edited to add: While on my long awaited vacation, it occurred to me while I was listening to my boyfriend sing to me via my i pod that, for years, I have been Calling baby baby please as opposed to CRYING baby baby please. Maybe that is why he took so damn long to show up in Hartford. I apparently suck at being a groupie as I do not know the lyrics without flaw. My deepest and sincerest apologies Sting....